Since I became a parent five years ago, making the time and finding the energy to enrich and develop my marriage has been a struggle for me. Now, don’t get me wrong, I have a great husband and I love him deeply. And now, that I am home with our children, things have gotten a LOT better. I do not feel like I am on a hamster wheel, rushing out of the house at 6:45 am and coming home at 5:45 pm. I can actually start thinking about how I can improve myself whereas before I was in survival mode. That being said, I know “I” could do a better job when it comes to building our relationship.
I think it is very easy for me as a stay at-home mother to have my children become the priority in my life. They, at three and five years old, are still very dependent on me for many things. Being a home schooling Mom, I am also with them ALL THE TIME. However, there are things I can do to help balance my life and ensure my marriage is the priority relationship in the family. I recently realized, I need to look no further than my parents for an example.
Growing up, when my father came home, he greeted us with hugs and kisses, but then he headed straight into the kitchen to talk to my mother. He sat down at our pink tiled peninsula on his special stool. He then poured two glasses of wine, one for my mother, and one for himself, out of a Carlo Rossi jug he had fetched from the cabinet nearby. My mother would be preparing the evening meal, and they would chat about the day. It only lasted about fifteen minutes, the amount of time it took they to share a glass of wine, but we, children, knew better than to interrupt this conversation. After that, my father would head down the hallway and change out of his suit and tie.
As a child, I had no doubt my father loved my mother. I also knew that their marriage took priority over all other relationships in the family. It was their loving example of a Christian marriage, and parenting, I hope to pass this on to my daughters.
How was your day, honey? How about a glass of Carlo Rossi?